Cats and Rabbits
by sandarikka
Summary: It's Christmas, and Lavi's happier than ever. The entire Black Order is waiting to see just what it is that he's gotten for Kanda for Christmas, and why Lavi's so happy about it...


Lavi walked down the corridors of the Black Order, his hands clasped behind his back and a huge grin on his face. In fact, he was practically skipping. After weeks of searching, he'd finally found the best Christmas present possible for the stubborn and grumpy Exorcist Yuu Kanda.

Lavi felt so happy, in fact, that he skipped down to Allen's rooms and knocked on the door.

Allen answered, but when he saw Lavi, his face froze in an expression of fear and he slammed the door shut again.

Lavi pouted. "Oh, come on, Moyashi! What was that for? I haven't done anything!"

"Oh, really?" Allen's voice replied, muffled by the door. "Then why do you have such a silly grin on your face? That face means trouble!"

Lavi smiled again. "I guess that's true! But don't worry, the trouble doesn't happen until tomorrow."

Allen groaned but opened the door. "It's Christmas Day tomorrow, Lavi. Don't you think you can lay off the tricks for just ONE day?"

Lavi shook his head vigorously, still smiling happily. "This isn't a trick!" he proclaimed. "It's a present! My present for Yuu!" He couldn't resist giving a wicked smirk, making Allen flinch.

"Do you mean you as in me, or Yuu as in Kanda?" Allen asked cautiously.

"Yuu, as in Kanda, of course!" Lavi couldn't sit still. He got up and started pacing.

Allen shook his head ruefully. "I'm not sure if I want to be there when Kanda opens it, or if I want to be far, far away..."

Lavi gave what served for a wink with his eye patch. "Don't worry. Yuu's going to love it!" With that, Lavi burst out the door, laughing happily and skipping down the corridors. "Why can't tomorrow come faster?"

Allen shut the door behind him, hoping that Lavi knew what he was doing. Kanda wasn't known for his celebratory spirit.

The halls and corridors of the Black Order were decked with tinsel, courtesy of Lavi. The dining hall was sparkling clean and home to the largest Christmas tree anyone had ever seen, also courtesy of Lavi, who was very excited about this particular Christmas. After all, for the first time in years Lavi felt certain he'd got Kanda a present he'd like.

Of course, Lavi thought that secretly Kanda liked it when Lavi gave him the girly shampoo he usually bought. Lavi paused in his happy dance. It was true that Kanda hated opening presents... Lavi usually had to sneak into Kanda's room and leave them in there. And it was also true that Lavi usually had to hide for most of Boxing Day after Kanda returned to his room and found the gifts Lavi and the others left there.

Some of the other Exorcists wondered why Lavi insisted on buying things for Kanda year after year. It wasn't that Kanda hated Christmas in particular, just that he thought it was a pointless celebration and he didn't like celebrations. Kanda usually spent any celebrations in the Black Order in a secret location that Lavi had yet to discover. Kanda often requested missions that covered Christmas Day, but this year Lavi had begged Komui to give all those missions to other Exorcists so that Kanda would _have_ to endure Christmas.

Setting the box down carefully, Lavi picked the locks on Kanda's door like he did every year on Christmas Day. Picking up the box again, Lavi tiptoed into Kanda's room and sat down on the chair. He set the box carefully on his lap and opened it so he could peek inside. He had to bite his tongue hard to stop the giggles from emerging as he looked at the present inside.

It was an hour before dawn on Christmas Day. Lavi hadn't been able to sleep from excitement, so he'd got up, recovered the present from the corner of his closet, put it in the plain box, and set out to wait for Kanda to wake. After all, Lavi told himself, if he'd waited until everyone was awake, Kanda would already be gone to his hiding spot.

A tiny noise escaped from the box, and Kanda sat bolt upright in bed. Seconds after his eyes fell on Lavi, the long-haired Exorcist had Mugen pointing at his throat. Lavi clutched the box tightly so that he wouldn't drop it.

"Merry Christmas, Yuu!" Lavi sang, though his voice trembled slightly.

Kanda's hand wavered. "Che. What do you want, baka usagi?" He sheathed Mugen and started to pull his Exorcist uniform out of the cupboard.

Distracted, Lavi momentarily forgot about the present. "Come on, Yuu, it's Christmas! You can wear something _other_ than your uniform for once in your life."

Kanda ignored him and tried not to think about what might be in that cursed box.

"Oh, yeah!" Lavi set the box down on the table. "I got you a present! It's really, really, really, really, really good this year. You'll like it."

"That'll be a change," Kanda growled. He didn't turn around from his cupboard. "Now get out."

Lavi stuck out his bottom lip and pouted. "Oh, come on, open it! I wanna see your face!"

A nerve twitched in Kanda's eye. "Get out, usagi! And take your stupid present with you."

Lavi sighed. "Fine, I'm going." He tiptoed out the door, closed it, and peered through the keyhole.

Finally in peace and quiet, Kanda finished getting dressed. He buckled Mugen on and turned to leave. Another tiny noise escaped from the box. Kanda glared at it from the corner of his eye. He thought he'd told that stupid rabbit to take the box with him. Kanda clenched his teeth. He really did hate Christmas. Everyone got excited for no reason, especially Lavi. He hated having to put up with Lavi's antics normally, and they were always twice as bad on holidays.

Still, since that stupid rabbit had left the present behind, he might as well open it to see what the rabbit had got so excited about.

Kanda crossed the room and reached out a hand to the box. Lifting the lid, he braced himself for the usual idiotic present. Though why Lavi would be so especially excited if it was just the usual stuff, he had no idea.

A tiny grey cannonball erupted from the box, somersaulting over Kanda's shoulder to land on the bed behind him.

Outside the room, Lavi wriggled around, trying to see Kanda's reaction through the tiny keyhole. One shout gave him all the confirmation he needed.

"LAVIIIII!"

Lavi gave a guilty grin and bolted. No way was he going anywhere near Kanda for a few days, at least until Kanda realised what a good present it was.

Kanda stormed to his door and flung it open. There was no sign of the red-haired Exorcist, or any other for that matter. Though the inhabitants of the nearby rooms were definitely awake after that, none of them would dare leave their rooms for fear of incurring Kanda's wrath.

Kanda cursed and turned back into his room. He'd have to do something about Lavi's present before he disappeared for the day. After all, no way was he leaving it in his room and there was no way he was keeping it. Exorcists don't need cats, especially not Exorcists like Kanda.

Kanda cursed again as he tripped over the little bundle of fluff as it leapt and danced around his feet, trying to catch his coat ends. The little creature mewled in disgust as he scooped it up and threw back in the box, shutting the lid. Kanda glared at the box and started thinking about his revenge on Lavi. The rabbit would regret this present for the rest of his life.

But now that the kitten had seen some of its new world, it wasn't content with staying in the box. It knocked the lid off and leapt out into the world. The little grey cat stared around its new world with bright blue eyes. The first thing it saw was a long black strand of _toy._ The moving pony tail was the perfect plaything.

Kanda let out a grunt of exasperation as he untangled the cat from his hair. Holding the creature tightly in one hand, he gave it his prized death stare. The kitten didn't even bat an eyelid, instead swiping at his long bangs as they dropped past its face.

The furious Exorcist shoved the cat back in Lavi's box and stormed out to find the junior Bookman's rooms. Not bothering to knock, he kicked the door open and left the box on the bed, slamming the door loudly behind him. That solved that problem, for now. Later, once this stupid thing called Christmas was over, Kanda would go and find Lavi and make him pay.

A week passed. No matter how Kanda tried, he could never find Lavi when he wanted to. And worse, no matter how many times he returned the blasted kitten to Lavi's room, it ended back in his own home.

The cat had shredded several of his shirts, ripped a hole in his sheets, and fallen in love with him. Lavi didn't even need to return the cat to Kanda's room anymore since the little kitten followed him around everywhere anyway.

The other Exorcists avoided Kanda usually. But they all found it hard not to laugh when they saw an angry Kanda storming along down the corridors in search of Lavi, with a tiny, bouncing grey ball of fluff following him.

And, much to Kanda's irritation, the cat thought his hair made a good nest to sleep. He'd woken up that morning with the animal asleep in his hair – his _hair _– and was now on a murderous rampage, determined not to return to his room until he found Lavi.

Allen saw him coming and ducked around a corner. He had no desire to run into Kanda when he was obviously in such a bad mood. His aura was ominous enough, and Allen knew he'd start laughing if he caught sight of the kitten that Lavi had dubbed "Steel-Heart Breaker", or Heart for short. The rest of the Black Order, led by Komui, had all joined in what Lavi called "Project Kitten", attempting to catch Kanda showing affection to the little animal. Allen had to agree that Kanda was definitely a cat person.

Allen watched as Kanda stormed down the corridors, methodically checking in every room. In one hand he held Mugen, the other used to slam doors open and closed. Allen chuckled to himself. He knew Kanda would never find Lavi; he'd left on a mission on Boxing Day specifically to escape from Kanda's wrath.

But Allen couldn't stop the laugh bursting out when he saw Heart skipping around Kanda's feet and causing the older Exorcist to trip over. Growling, Kanda pointed Mugen in the cat's face. Heart stared solemnly up the blade into Kanda's eyes, and then pushed the sword away with its paw, trotting up to Kanda's feet and nuzzling them affectionately.

Kanda nudged the creature away with a boot, but he didn't do it roughly. Allen let a little gasp as he realised that Lavi's plan just might be working.

Kanda's head snapped up. "Moyashi!"

Allen gulped and turned to run, but Kanda was too fast. Mugen's blade was at his throat and Heart was hissing menacingly at him, as though it was joining Kanda in his rampage.

"Where. Is. That. Rabbit," Kanda growled in a low, furious voice. He seemed intent on ignoring the fact that his kitten was trying to help by attacking Allen's boots.

Unable to wipe the nervous grin off his face, Allen replied, "I don't know? How's the kitty?"

Kanda growled again and threw Allen to the floor. Then he stamped off down the corridor. Heart gave Allen one last hiss and raced off after its human.

Allen smiled to himself. Lavi would be pleased, though in danger, when he returned.

Another week passed. Lavi returned, bouncing and desperate to see Kanda and his kitty. That night, he and Allen snuck around to Kanda's room to take turns peering in the keyhole.

Kanda passed by the door in his night clothes. They heard the pattering of little feet as Heart followed him to the bed. Kanda sat down on the edge and held up a piece of shredded cloth.

Lavi and Allen paused to stare at each other in astonishment as Kanda started to play with the little grey kitten. They listened as Kanda muttered to himself.

"Stupid rabbit. First year he actually got a present that's not going to piss me off. Wonder where he is? Che. I can't be even bothered to kill him."

Lavi's grin stretched from ear to ear as he whispered to Allen, "Mission accomplished."


End file.
